@ Delicate-Antique.

One step at a time.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010 || 4:05 PM

- This post is gonna be flooded by lot's of pictures and words.

When I'm sad, I eat.
When I'm stress, I cut.
When I'm happy, I laugh.
When I'm troubled, out alone.
When I'm angry, I won't show it out, but I cry.

And I don't know why this few days I became very quiet. Be it in school or outside, I've got no mood to do anything. When family, friends or classmates joke something about me, I will just stare at them. Comment on me was; ''Woah, Lynn very fierce.'' Meet me out and you'll know okay. I have no interest in anything already. I skipped lessons often, I do my assignments last minute, I nagged by lecturers, I didin't hang out with friends often like last time. I've got no targets, no hope, no dreams. No interest in EVERYTHING. You know I could just cry for nothing. I can cry in just 3 seconds, for nothing. Am I weird enough? There isin't any logical reasons for my dark feelings. No one seems to care, I could feel that I'm a burden to everyone. I just wanna be alone for now. I don't show my sadness on my face whenever I go, not even my close friends. But I cry, I blame, I hate, I'm terrified of everything. I cry to lessen my heartaches, I blame myself for being stupid, I hate people around me for nothing, I terrified for you. I felt that I have a difficult role to play in life. I had lots of weird dreams about you and me for the past few weeks. I tried to think throught it carefully, but an image kept getting in the way. In the real world, and attached you to my Dream vision. The imagination needs something to build on. Everything fades in time, posibilities can be scary at times. I need a calm day to sort out my thinking. God, please stop this for me. It's miserable. I want nothing but happiness. Why is it so difficult? Just grant me, please?

But I'll try to be happy aye? <:

-

Overdue pictures....

- Pool session with da jie and er jie.

- Melody and Darryl birthday party.

- Zirca.

19th March, Friday - With much hesitaiton, I still went to school. Mr. Oh nagged at my worked and said I became lazy. ''R-E-D-O'' is what he said to my work. I've got like 10 asignments need to do, cause past few weeks I did nothing. Shall rephrased; cause past few weeks I don't have the mood to do. After Mr. Oh commented on my work, my mood was really down, I just packed my stuffs and went home alone. Get changed, headed to find dajie at Petir LRT to lent digital camera from her. On the way home in the bus, an accident happened. It just happened right infront of me. I was startled, cause the crashed were so loud that caught everyone's attention. One of them is a taxi-driver. They paused for awhile, and then drove off. I was relieved that both party were fine, but they need to repair their car for sure. Bad thing is, I sprained my leg at that time. But it's not that serious though.

20th March, Saturday - Sheesha session with Aaron, Hadi, Hafiz, Kenneth, Qing Hong and Sheryl at Haji-Lane. Saw Ah pang at iluma, I think he can recognized me. 0,0 After that went Boat-Quay with them, home at 10.30pm.

21th March, Sunday - SHERYL; HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY!! Went her place for buffet at around 5pm, home at 9pm. On the way home in MRT with Aaron and Hadi, there's a indian guy staring at me with his SCARY BIG EYES. Aaron saw it and couldn't stop laughing, then he told Hadi. Both of them keep laughing non-stop. They caught another 2 indian guys attention, then they keep look at Aaron and Hadi then keep smiling. After we alighted from Outram Station, then we know three of the indians are friends. -.-

22th March, Monday - Went class chalet at 6pm, it's Mr Chua's 40th birthday as well. Went home at 12am. On the way home in train, I couldn't hold my tears anymore which I don't know why. >: Here's one of the picture taken from my handphone, sorry for the bad quality of it. Forgot to bring camera, so I only took one photo.

I only see you in my eyes.

Why do I still hold on to it? I cant let go....

I don't know why.